The flight has "mechancial difficulties."

GOOD NEWS: This has been identified before we actually started to fly.

BAD NEWS: Instead of flying to birmingham via atlanta, we are now flying to birmingham via cincinnati. And instead of getting there in the afternoon we're not getting there until almost 10pm.

WORSE NEWS: There are no bathrooms once you go through security in this terminal. NO BATHROOMS. Good lord. Now I have to make some tough personal decisions. But you don't want to hear about that.

More later...

UPDATE: New flight is already delayed.

FULL DISCLOSURE: This crapper-less terminal doesn't look at all like this photo.

Thanks to americancopywriter for the link.

RATS: That boob energy post didn't stay on top for long. Oh well.

Memories.

Here I sit with KMoss and Jess at 6:09am at Sioux Gateway Airport (call name SUX) on the way to Denver.

Up at 3am CST! Client mtg at 11am MT! Advertising is so glamorous.

(The tickets were half the price of flying from Sioux Falls. Whaddya gonna do?)

Anyway. Reminds me of my days working for Gateway. Lots of SUX time back then.

There is literally ONE gate here. I'm pretending it's my own private airport. Like I'm John Travolta.

You may or may not know that my boss, Smither, taped a photo of a little kid skinning a squirrel to my door a few weeks ago. While gross, it's a pretty good metaphor for any business day.

Sometimes I am the squirrel.

Sometimes I am the kid.

Sometimes I am the knife.

(And so on.)

So Saturday I felt like the squirrel. More after the jump...

[More]

I do.

They keep announcing it at DIA this morning. Everyone just kind of milling around like sheep, not really listening, while a very calm woman asks us all to "please make a note of it." I think the idea is to get everyone to look at each other suspiciously.

I'm trying to be cheerful, but became a problem for one poor kid working at Caribou Coffee. He handed me my large, triple-shot, sugar-free, non-fat vanilla latte (hold the foam) - with all foam. Seriously. I have been here all night with no luggage and an airline-issued toothbrush/toothpaste and I am holding the line for good coffee. So he made it over for me.

Here are some more people who have been stuck in airports.

I guess if that's as bad as it gets, no big deal. (The plane is supposed to take off in an hour, and yet it isn't here ... only a gaping hole of nothing at the end of the jetway. I continue to be optimistic. (Perhaps they're just polishing the good plane for us! The one with the timberwolf! That would be way cooler than a marsupial - note to KMoss.)

If you don't know what I'm taking about, Frontier has different animals painted on the tails of their planes and it's a huge distraction for me because I base my entire self-esteem on which animal I am assigned. The fllght out was a momma swan and her baby, and that was okay. But it's no timberwolf.)

I'm stuck in Denver.

Flight cancelled.

Bird hit plane. ("Bird strike" is the official airline term.)

Very tired.

Very crabby.

NO CHANGE OF CLOTHES.

Free accommodations at Crystal Inn of Aurora, CO (sounds like meth).

Dark mood descending.

See ya tomorrow?

Kristie told me about this over lunch today. Had to share it. I could watch it all day. The squirrels arms are the best part.