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Katie Terror Alert Status:
Bling Bling Katie
Extreme risk of excited Katie talking in high pitched voice - Dolphins swim in fear.
Deer-in-the-Headlights Katie
Extreme unpredictability in face of oncoming deadlines. Approach with caution.
Apocalypse Katie
Life as we know it ceases to exist
Latest from The Onion
In Focus: Senate Candidate Drops Out Of Race Due To Shyness
How Are We Protecting Our Valuables?
Alternate Health Care Bills
Sports: Chris Bosh Out For Season After Cutting Open Knee To See How It Works
Universe Comes To Halt As Kid Flips Through First Shark Book
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